Go through the ways the guy proudly smiles upwards at the you from your cellular telephone monitor as he dangles their Hook of the day within foot away from his cargo trousers-clothed feet! You already know those individuals pockets are merely filled with carabiners, hooks, and zero-connections! Imagine the cute Boy Scout your went along to basic school that have. Remember how they have been so of good use and you will know all the different types of knots? Ok, today image them grown up-up and refusing in order to Venmo you $250 getting his 50 % of the new abortion. Today image your rising into the sunrays, he calls “nature’s noisy alarms.” Honestly, internationalwomen.net Ha et glimt av lenken I don’t know that is tough.

Nebraska: The Armchair Quarterback

You’ve gone through around three (3) java dining tables in 2010 because your boyfriend, an enthusiastic armchair quarterback out-of Nebraska, refuses to stop crushing all of them inside anger whenever their group will lose. He categorically does not want to believe that the players are unable to tune in to him out-of his family area and you may, this is why, their post-fumble “Get real. ” cry try noisy. The Friday, without fail, you will be possibly playing your label all the advisor and you can player a good screwing moron, or freezing from the tailgate – never ever during the genuine games, even if. He will never ever over come one 12 months and he try nearly a 3rd-string walking-on the kicker into the Huskers, and because the guy covers every thing the fresh new damn big date, neither could you.

Nevada: This new Perma-Bachelor

If only my suit complement me including Bradley Cooper’s did regarding the Dangle over, believes the newest Vegas Fuckboy, upcoming living might possibly be done. Truth be told there he happens, prowling through the pub along with his top undone you to switch as well of several, slurring his terms and you may sloshing their martini. Only if it tasted as nice as they appear, the guy magic to help you himself. Never ever ask your when deciding to take away from his eyeglasses, because they are covering up a set of crusted, bloodshot attention which were immediately following simple and you can laden up with existence. He could be now a walking party server, recurring to help you their family members: “You’ll receive hitched? Loss! It’s the solitary lives for me personally, brah!”, unsure he’ll end up being doomed to enhance a paunch, let their pricey match feel tarnished and you can terrible, and be one of the Vegas slot machine grannies, thumbing quarters for the servers and you will taking a two-liter bottles away from diet plan Coke, hoping to victory this new honor away from his lost youngsters.

“Hey girl, don’t We see you from the Tri-Kap dager a week ago?” was a consistent beginning gambit of your own Brand new Hampshire Fuckboy who try Steeped But Embarrassed About any of it. A beneficial Dartmouth man through-and-through, he or she is the best vision out of button-downs, khaki jeans, and you will a beneficial blazer which are worn at formals also at his dad’s yacht pub. Inquire your outright in the event that he could be rich, he’s going to be quick to tell your his friends cannot own an excellent personal sprinkle – it is just a risk in the a provided G6 ranging from a few of my personal dad’s business partners. And he does not have any a mansion towards Nantucket, it’s simply a small summer house into the coastline around the Obamas’ set. A great key when you need to put your on location – ask your to pronounce title out of their very expensive check out (Audemars Piguet) and watch your squirm.

The new Mexico: This new Plug

The newest Mexico, people say, is the property away from enchantment, a wilderness in which their road trip hopes and dreams can come genuine. It is closer to a dirty nightmare the spot where the dudes smell of dirt and smegma. Your North american country fuckboy, in the event the he or she is from Albuquerque, is way too eager to make suggestions attractions away from Breaking Bad – you understand, one to domestic you could throw a pizza pie to, or one crystal meth hotel – since the that’s all they have. You to, with his “I’m the person who knocks” shirt (stained), a broad-brimmed cap (will not complement), and you may Heisenberg specs (actually a small rigid so that they look from inside the and leave purple, welt-such as for instance indents on the his head). When the he could be away from Santa Fe, predict a comparable however with conversations from the Ayahuasca very tiresome possible want to hurl yourself off the cliffs in the Los Alamos.